I was a disaster, a very successful disaster, sales were piling up, phone calls to make, food were getting bad in the fridge and I was very sick but working like crazy. My 14 hour work day was killing me, I was not able to sleep at night and my impossible to-do list was driving me nuts. I am my own boss but I was a tyrant to myself. Nobody was pushing me to have that life but I was treating myself like the worst cruel and oppressive ruler. I was not allowing myself to have the basic rest, food or even a long shower during my exhausting day. I was angry all the time, reactive and depressed all the time. I also had terrible migraines and back pain. Then one night I fell and I had to stop everything at once. Life was telling me to stop treating myself that bad, then I stop and everything made sense.
I decided I wanted to be a successful balanced and well rested human. A normal person who owns a business but have time to write in her journal, take showers, eat breakfast and sleep 8 hours. I was slowly killing myself and I did not notice my body, relationships and mind were paying a very expensive toll for that.
I am implementing new routines to keep my body and mind on track. I am being my own best friend. Self care is easy if you know how to care for others you will be able to be kind to yourself the same way.
I am not asking you to take a 1 year off from work or go to a spa every single week ( It would be amazing I know), you can make simple and easy tasks during the day, 5 Minutes here, 5 minutes there and you will feel how awesome it feels to be a normal person. We can be wonder-woman without stop being human.
12 easy ways to be kind to yourself:
Don’t miss the “BE KIND TO YOURSELF” Printable sign Download at the end of the post
Just breathe 1, 2, 3, take a deep breath as if you wanted to get air into your stomach. This is one of the ways you can take oxygen in to your brain and calmed your mind. Have you ever realized you were not breathing? It has happened to me. I have in panic mode and think everything is going to end… I felt everything was falling apart in my life. Just breath and take a break is the kinder thing we can do for ourselves, not because we run we will go further. Just sit and breathe.
Some people complain that modern life is a cycle, eat, work, sleep and start again the next day. Have you ever felt that you are on an endless treadmill in which you run and run without any destination?
If you do not rest and not sleep well your energy at some point will run out and life will make you stop eventually. You will have to stop because you are sick or in panic mode… It is not the same to stop because we have to than stopping because we want to have a balanced life.
I have suffered for years from insomnia. I usually wake up in the middle of the night and can not go back to sleep. Lack of sleep is exhausting.
Life has made me stop in a very painful way. I came to the conclusion that I want to think less and be more strategic with my time and that includes scheduling fun, breaks and sleep time.
There are infinite benefits of having a good night sleep. The next day I am more creative, my body feels better, the pain is gone and I have much more energy to do more things.
Stay up late working usually makes me wake up in the middle of the night thinking about my to-dp lost and I wake up tired the next day.
Give yourself time to Take a nap in the middle of the afternoon when you’re in middle of something you don’t know not how to resolve…Rest and let your mind relax and you will find answers.
Go early to bed, read a book, write in your journal or just put on your favorite pajamas and stay warm in bed without worrying about anything.
3. Listen to your Body
We have very wise bodies. We are receiving signals all the time about what our body needs. We only need to learn to listen … are you hungry? are you thirsty? Do you have any pain? are you tired? Just Listen!
4. Keep track of your time
I have been tracking how many hours I work, sleep and just have time for my personal life. At the beginning of the year was almost alarming to know that 80% of my time was dedicated to my business and the remaining 20% was only for basic eat, sleep, shower, cook, clean and be.
Since I started tracking I reduced the number of hours I dedicate to my work. I work in 45 minute blocks to work in a single task.
This allow me to open spaces for personal activities like reading a book, write a diary, coloring something nice, see a movie, take a nap, go out for coffee with a friend or just be.
5. Have a Journal
Having a diary was a habit I had when we were in school. It was fun to write about my experiences, feelings and fears. My therapist has been asking me for two years to write again and it has been a long process. Give yourself permission to keep a diary, write about whatever it is, about what you did, about what you lived, about what you felt, even to make the list of the market, empty your mind UNTIL there is nothing left. Give yourself the time to write about the most important person in your life. Give yourself 5 minutes with a chamomile tea and download on paper what you are feeling
6. Slow down & be present
Contradictory when we are busier or when things are not going well and we feel that everything is getting out of control, the best way to find balance again is to focus on ourselves and stop. We have to stop and breathe, we give permission to feel ourselves in that present moment. There is an exercise of presence, which can be very positive in the event that we feel saturated frightened, which is to see ourselves. For example, I’m sitting here on my computer, on a chair in my office, I’m writing a post for my blog, it’s hot, I feel sad.
Then you make the mental journey of what is happening outside, of what you are living, without thinking about the future or the past, simply being.
7. Stop pushing yourself to hard
Sometimes we can become our worst enemies, we are always demanding and setting high standards. We forget that we are just humans. We can improve and we can move forward, but there is nothing broken in us, we are already perfect as we are. Be patient with yourself, celebrate your gains and analyze your defeats. you do not have to be right all the time, the world does not have to be like you want it to be and you can allow yourself to simply be, be wrong and not be perfect. I love myself and I accept me as I am.
8. Clean your to-do list
Will it be necessary to have an endless list of tasks? will it be necessary to try to make it all ourself? The task list is the biggest productivity trap in the world, we feel successful and important just because we have a very long list of things to do. Success is not having so many things pending. For me the success of time management is having free time to do what I want, to be creative, to work on my projects and to take time for myself. Give yourself time to start your to-do list and determine which tasks are really worth doing prioritize the three most important things you have to do on that day and start there.
9. De-clutter your mind & Space
We are women and we want everything to be clean, nice and organized around us. But have you ever thought about how you keep your head?
We should include having a mental cleansing session, we should put on our agenda once a week, to sit down to clean those things that no longer serve us, fears, limiting beliefs, pain to the past, grudges, sad memories and all those things that we no longer want to carry. We are beings of light and part of happiness is to be at peace with ourselves and with others. Give yourself some time to take out the garbage and understand that although we are not perfect we have many things to give.
Take out the trash, understand that by loving yourself you can come to love others better. Do not carry sad memories, give permission to have a clear mind and open to new possibilities. It’s time to Clean your mind.
10. Dress up with something pretty
It’s time to take off your pajamas or exercise clothes and take a hot shower, look for your best dress, wear perfume, make-up and feel beautiful. You do not need to buy something new, just find something that you feel pretty and sexy with. Deciding to fix and connect with your femininity can be very powerful, empower yourself, feel like a woman and decide to cut with the sadness from the outside inwards.
1 1. Call or Meet a friend
If you feel sad, do not stay alone, call a friend and talk about anything. Connecting with others can find value to your sadness and remember that you are important to others. When you are sad and you get away from the people who love you, you are making the emptiness you feel inside even bigger. Take the phone and call a friend and tell her how you feel. If possible, go for a coffee and have fun with her.
12. Book some time for yourself
We have over-saturated agendas, endless task lists and we are always fantasizing about what we would like to do when we had time. We try to run to see if we have a little more time and the bad news is that we will never have more. We only have 24 hours a day, of which we have to sleep at least 8, so we have 16 hours. We all have the same time.
- The decisions we make at each moment in which we invest time determine the difference what we can do in our lives. It’s not about running, it’s about making intelligent decisions.
- Time is our greatest resource and how we manage it now we will make a difference in our life tomorrow.
- It is necessary to schedule spaces for yourself, agenda spaces to go to a cafe to dream about what you want in the coming years, give yourself time to take a nap, to take a walk and breathe, to eat a sweet or to simply get to know yourself better .
- Do not run without knowing where you are going, be clear about your goals and go for them. Be your best ally. We only have ourselves, let’s stop being the executioners of our own humanity and accept with our shortcomings, our talents, our fears, our defeats and our dreams.